05 September 2010


Tomorrow morning I return to work. I currently have a headache, you know, one of those post cry fest kind. I'm probably dehydrated from tears, sweat from being all worked up (hormones?) and lots of milk being made. I should feel thankful. Miss Georgiana is going to be spending the day with her daddy! He is a bit nervous, but excited. I feel... not excited. The longest I have been away from her is to take a shower. In 12 1/2 weeks that is the longest time. I didn't plan it that way. I actually planned to be away here and there for an hour or more or a few hours even. But, all of a sudden my return to work seemed so soon and I just wanted to cuddle little Georgiana every second possible. And, I'm so glad I did. I keep reminding myself she will be fine, better than fine, I have prayed over and over that she will not even notice I am gone. That she will not miss me at all, and that the almost 12 hours I will be gone will be the quickest hours of my life. Of course, this past week she has become very very much a momma's girl. Makes it a little more difficult to leave.
My midwife was training a student (Beth) during my last trimester and beyond. She said I would have an 8lb baby or bigger (Georgie was 8 days overdue and a whopping 6lbs 11oz). She also told me (post prego) that because of breast feeding, by 10 weeks or so I would be lighter than my pre prego weight. Ha... not so, I still sing the country song lyrics 'Rockin the beer gut,' when I wiggle into my jeans.
She also said that when I have to return to work it will not feel natural, she followed it with "because, it isn't really."
Well Beth, I think you are right. I know you are.
Earlier today, when I was a tearful mess, I was talking to my Aunt Michelle. She said she can remember having the exact same feelings I am having, 21 years ago. Twenty One... Which does bring me to a positive :) Little Ashley is turning 21 tomorrow! Happy Birthday cousin, we love you so much!!! And, Ashley can attest that she is not at all affected by her mommy going back to work. They both survived and their bond was not at all tainted. Something I am going to try and remember :)
Oh, and something to distract me from the imminent return:
Grocery Outlet. Who knew they had such great products!?! All that for only $14.00 and some change. And the Kashi TLC bars are absolutely delish!
We've had a wonderful weekend, other than all of my nerves about tomorrow. Friday evening we used a restaurant.com coupon and had dinner at The Black Diamond Bakery. The food was so tasty! Kelly said his Kobe Beef Burger was the best he has ever had, and he's sampled his share of burgers. Another best ever is the coconut cream pie. Seriously yummy, and very much large enough to share. We shared a piece and still took some home... well at least took it in a to go box. My stomach discovered more room on the way home, so I enjoyed it on our scenic drive through the country.
Yesterday, we had a nice morning at home. Complete with a little walk. Then, after Georgiana's nap we headed to my sister's house. My brother in law made chicken pomodoro for dinner and it is definitely something I want to try and make at home. It was so good, satisfying and fresh.
Then today, I met a bunch of close friends for lunch. By this point my nerves were getting the best of me, poor Georgie was picking up on them, and both she and I were quite emotional. But, it was still wonderful to visit and be encouraged. And, Praise the Lord for tall friends. The changing table in the bathroom was literally up to my shoulders... What in the world!?! At least it made us laugh. Thank you again Amanda for going on your tippy toes to get in the diaper bag, I would have been at a loss! :)
Well, it is about 9:30 pm. My sweet baby is sound asleep and I have a few things to prepare for tomorrow. Off I go! And, I will try to continue to focus on the following:
"Be anxious for nothing,
but in everything by prayer and supplication,
with thanksgiving,
let your requests be known to God;
and the peace of God,
which surpasses all understanding,
will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus."
Philippians 4:6-7
These verses are on a print in our family room. I read them often.
Lastly, a little picture of my Georgie Bear:


Stefanie said...

praying for your first day back!!!

Stacy said...

Are you going back to work full time? From one working momma to another, I just want to encourage you that you are a great Mommy and that your little girl will be just fine! I won't say that the road ahead is easy, it's not. But God has paved the way, he's chosen this path for you and your family and he will be with you tomorrow and beyond.

Me... said...

My goodness she is a cutie!
it says you posted this yesterday but it didn't show up on my page till this evening. Regardless I talked to Scott on his way over to your place this morning and he mentioned you were working. My stomach sank for you and I though about you all day, Prayed for you too :)
I hope it went okay, I knew it was coming up soon so you have been on my mind quite a bit.
So glad she got to spend the day with daddy :) what fun memories for Kelly!